Jessica’s Shadow

Animals have always been an important part of my life.  From them I’ve learned how to love unconditionally and cherish the quietest moments in life.

When I adopted Shadow, I was 9 and he was 14.  The photo above was taken approximately one year later.  This February, he turned 36.  He has been a very important part of my life – of me – for 22 years.

Shadow lives on our small hobby farm with my mom and all of our other animals.  From earlier posts you may know that the farm is a 7 hour drive from my home.  It is currently listed for sale, and my hope is to move my mom and our animals much closer to me as soon as possible.  I really need her – all of them – closer.

Yesterday Shadow failed to eat all of his grain, which is quite unusual.  Everything else seems normal – he’s grazing, behaving as he should, etc.  But it worries me.

He isn’t a young colt anymore, and while we have made sure he has the best food, the warmest winter blanket, and great veterinary care, I know he can’t live forever.

When someone you love is with you for so long, you can take their presence for granted.  As I sit here crying, I think of my last visit to the farm and how I could have spent more time with him but didn’t.

Hopefully in the morning I will hear that he ate all of his breakfast and whinnied to be let out into the pasture with his mares.

I will never be ready to lose Shadow, but I hope when I do, it will be at a new, closer farm, where I can sit and spend time with him.  Because I’ll always be his girl, and he’ll always be Jessica’s Shadow.