Newton’s 3rd Law

For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.  This seems to be my body’s guiding principle lately.

My weekend was a mixed bag.  On Saturday I woke with the best intentions.  I wanted to get breakfast and hit the home improvement stores in search of an appliance sale.  My 2003 builder-grade stove was as basic as possible, and I definitely wanted to replace it before trying to sell my house.  Since Seth moved in, I’ve been trying to save money by cooking dinner a few nights a week.  I figured I might as well upgrade the stove now and enjoy it myself.

We hit a diner for breakfast then headed south to the Sears outlet in Delaware.  Since I’m not an aspiring chef (most of my cooking involves pre-packaged dinners), I wasn’t looking for an advanced stove.  I wanted an upgrade from what I had, but that wasn’t a high measure.  My requirements: a window in the oven door, an interior light, and at least a few buttons on the panel so it didn’t look like a cheap stove.

When we arrived at the outlet, Seth assembled my transport chair and wheeled me up the long ramp and inside the warehouse.  After a quick stroll through tool-land we made our way to the stoves.  I quickly identified one that met my needs, and the price was right.  We quickly discussed whether or not we should shop around looking for a better deal, but I was pretty sure we wouldn’t do better; I was also starting to not feel good.  We made the purchase, waited at the loading dock, and then headed out.

Although we decided not to shop around for a better stove price (it turns out we got the best deal anyway), we still had reason to visit the home improvement stores.  Since we don’t have a good Lowe’s near us, we decided it was best to stop at one in Delaware on our way home.

Once there I obtained an electric scooter, and Seth and I set out on our adventure.  Normally I love a trip to Lowe’s or Home Depot.  We can browse for an hour and ogle all the tools and holiday specials.  But I was going downhill – and quick.  By the time we were looking at medicine cabinets I thought I would fall off the scooter and onto the floor.

We wrapped up our essential errands and headed home.  I took a percocet, turned on my heated mattress pad, and crawled into bed.  I felt awful.  Aside from the more definable symptoms of back pain and fever, I just felt terrible.  I stayed in bed, whining and complaining, until 10am the following day.

Sunday I awoke and once again felt human.  I had a suspicion that if I was to do anything productive, it had to happen immediately.  After some breakfast, Seth and I met our friends at a tailgate party.  It was good to see them, and we both had fun.

After a few hours, though, I hit a wall.  I was feeling feverish, percocet was no longer controlling my back pain, and the indescribable ‘bad’ feeling was just around the corner.  We said our goodbyes and headed home.

Once again, I took a percocet, turned on my heated mattress pad, and crawled into bed.  But I was determined that wouldn’t be the end of my day.  After napping for a few hours I forced myself out of bed and into presentable clothes.  We had a very tasty dinner then quickly returned me to my bed.

The whole weekend was a real fight for what I wanted to do.  Reflecting on it Sunday night, I declared victory.  I pushed, and my body pushed back.  But then I knowingly pushed again and braced for the backlash.  I guess that’s part of dealing with cancer: knowing the consequences of your actions.  It’s up to each person to decide how much backlash they can handle.  And honestly, I appreciate even having a decision to make.


4 responses to “Newton’s 3rd Law

  • readytotell

    Jessica. Once again my hats off to you and your spirit. . Keep up the fight. You are young. You’re kicking it!! Drink lots of water. Percocet and other meds dehydrate you. Can also make you feel weak. You have my best wishes always. I sound like a Mother, don’t I ? 🙂

    • Jessica

      Hehe, a little bit! Don’t worry, I drink a lot of water. Well, I eat a lot of ice, actually. Thanks again for reading, and I hope you’re doing well!

    • readytotell

      I am good. I look forward to your posts. And, yes, I am a Mother. I have a 27 year old daughter named Mayme and a 21 year old son named Ben. I also have a fierce 10 year old Yorkie named Ozzy (named after Ozzy Osbourne), who is perhaps smaller than your bunny. I am a big fan of yours, and I am routing for your strength and your happiness.

  • Sjoukje

    I think it is wonderful you keep on doing what you want to do, as best as you can! You go girl!!
    much love

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