Keeping the Clouds Away

I haven’t written lately; I’ve been very tired and perhaps not in the ‘sharing’ mood. First, let’s talk business…

My white blood cell count was low the last time I had chemo. I was still able to get treated, but some of the doses were reduced. On Friday I returned so they could recheck my counts. This time my hemoglobin and platelets were too low. (I suppose this explains some extra fatigue, shortness of breath, and racing heartbeat.) My white blood cell count was at the low end of acceptable, but my doctor felt this was artificially high due to a shot I take post-chemo to boost them.

This stuff is to be expected, but it might change the game a little. My doctor has requested I get a PET scan right away so we can see how active the cancer is. Based on the results I will either move to a maintenance chemo regimen (taking 2 of the 3 current drugs) or switch to an entirely different chemo cocktail.

What a disappointment. The train was chugging along smoothly while my doctor started every appointment with “your counts look good.” But now there’s talk of a shot to boost my red cell production and thoughts of switching chemo drugs. And every new drug means a chance of a bad reaction or undesirable side effects.

My PET scan will be later this week. Keep your paws crossed that I don’t have any new metastases.

Now on to some fun things… I have little adventures scheduled in July, August, and September. For one of them, three of my bunny friends and I will have a girls’ weekend at the farm in WV. It’s going to be so much fun! For another Seth and I have reserved the ‘swim with dolphins’ experience I discussed in a prior post. Everything has been carefully scheduled around my current chemo schedule, so my body better cooperate or else!

The other exciting thing has been my new bed. After considering it for months and receiving some great feedback to my blog post, I finally purchased a daybed and mattress for my living room. It’s absolutely awesome! I still have some sleep challenges, but when I do sleep I wake feeling much more rested. And my snuggle bunny is back! I have a makeshift step setup so Blossom can easily hop in and out of bed. This makes me so happy!

Otherwise I spend a lot of time indoors or in a pool (preferably one larger than my 8′ inflatable). I’m probably sleeping 10-12 hours a day in various segments. I try to listen to my body and not feel guilty if I need to rest all day. It’s a hard mindset to change because we naturally associate sloth with laziness.

And finally, I try to keep my stress to a minimum. I can think about being sick, but I don’t obsess over it. It upsets me that my counts are off, but I’m not shedding tears.

Nope, I just want to relax and enjoy the summer. Cancer will be around to worry about on less sunny days.


2 responses to “Keeping the Clouds Away

  • Barbara

    Jessica, I am keeping everything crossed for you. I’ve been where you’re at, and you are smart to listen to your body and rest. Please keep us poster. Barb

  • Sjoukje

    Keeping everything crossed that your counts will go back up again!

    And ooh so many great things to look forward to!! Enjoy them! Hurray for the bed and Blossom being there for you!

    much love & nosebonks from the boys

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