Down the Rabbit Hole

The first dose.  Never have I taken a sip of water with such weight.  My mind rushed to sort through all the potential outcomes and assign a probability to each.

I’m certainly excited to start the treatment.  And terrified.  It represents my best chance to control the cancer.  If it doesn’t work, options 2 and 3 await, but the odds aren’t nearly as promising.

And what if it does work?  Some patients respond well, but only for a short duration before the cancer mutates, metastasizes, or develops a resistance to the drug.  The median duration of response (for those who do) is approximately 11 months.

If I have adequate disease control for the median amount of time, that takes me until November 2012.  Then we look at options 2, 3, and potentially a new, still undiscovered option 4.  Wash, rinse, repeat.

No doubt I must learn to manage these proverbial shoes which dangle so precariously over my head.

One response to “Down the Rabbit Hole

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